not looking forward to....

baru igt nak enjoy winter hols.....an then...
macam yuki atas bumbung seme jatuh on top of my head...gedebushhhhh gitu
baru hbs meeting with sensei n even though it was particularly light..no marah marah...just telling us what we need to accomplish and so on...it was my meeting with my senior later thats making me feel so down now...

you see he just told me cuti kenkyu sampai 3 hb je la...mati2 igt sampai 5 hb...going to tokyo for an important event...from the 4th to 6th...3 hari kenkyu burn..kalau cuti sampai 5hb at least satu hari je...i can make up for that leasily... so sempai ku dgn happy nyer...i promise you he was smilling...ckp esok (esok yg sepatutnya dah cuti tuuuu) dtg kita buat experiment lg ye...smalam br dia ckp experiment dah hbs...n then br i sedar he said last for this year...bukak sekolah start balik datte...EVERYDAY....da yo....u see why i'm not looking forward to it....duduk dlm icebox tu tau....

plus the experiments usually take all day...n he said we'll do it sampai 31 january...that leaves me 5 days to write my ronbun...okla..i've already started tp..tp...the last few days are crucial to wright all the wrongs....make sure the sentences are futsukei not maskei....the sentences are dotted with periods not 'maru's...all the tedious little things lah katakan... n he expects me to matome all the data experiment baru tu in five days...the pictures, the 3D measurements, the thicknesss of every little crevice, the graphs which took me weeks to do for all the previous experiments and he wants me to do it in 5 days... ala kejap je katanya...hello i've been doing it alone....next year you jugak guna this data...help out man...ke ini keje undergad...get all the data ready...it doesn't help when the other person bawah the M2 dok goyang kaki je...dia nye senior buat seme...graphs and everything...

what am i doing...i thought i promised myself...jangan compare ngan others...couldn't help it i guess...take settle my emotions lagi...

nows the time to remind myself....syaz boleh... 5 hari kaa... yokka kan de yatte yaru...
as for all the experiments maybe i'll loose some weight...hahaha...but that's too much to hope for kanaaaa...

raya dlm koujyou

huhuhu...ntah pape ntah...

ada mesin potong besi kat blakang tempat saya buat jikken dlm koujyou tu...
bila org potong besi..dia keluar hibana (percikkan api)...
hari ni ada org potong besi kat situ...
bila tgk hibana tu, tak de la rasa pape pun...
n then..comes the smell...sokkuri dgn bau bunga api...
tetibe rasa cm raya..
bley tak...

hahahaha

1/15, 2/5, 2/10...

detaaaaaa.....tarikh tarikh that will surely make my lifw a little more hectic than usual...tarikh hantar sotsuronn youshi (graduation thesis summary), the actual sotsuron (grad thesis) and fimally the presentation that will be the culmination of my undergrad life..well if you don't count the graduation that is...it's not such a big thing here....you don't get to wear the robes or the caps..everyone wears suits...and only a few actually get to go on stage...so no...that day would probably not give me case of nerves...kat kousen dulu len ar...sorg2 naik pentas..so i had to worry about tripping on my high heels..haha..

anyway tomorrow cuti...and next week start winter hols...so i guess everyone is already in the holiday mood..nobody putting extra effort this week...mesti seme org tgh ckp kat diri sendiri...gakko akete kara de iiya.....kana...i myself feel like today is friday...datte esok cuti da mon..but then friday lak the dreaded jikken in the dreaded ice box of a koujou...and here i am babbling away..

so things i'm looking froward to next week...food, fun, and hubby...huhu...

skrg tgh having fun planning the menu...indian cuisine, youfuu, of course malay...hubby ckp mcm repetition of last years menu je yg malay tu..tp tak pe la kan...huhu..mana tau next year kita add chinese food lak...chinese food intimidates me..why..sbb bnyk seasonings that i don't know...and susah nak cr plak tu...

ok ...got to get back to my ronbun...

pindah pindah....

today...dengan rasminya bermulalah operasi pindah balik ke bangunan kikai yang baru siap direformasikan tu (wujud ke perkataan tu?)...anyway...kikkakenye sbb sokuteiki saya dok kt jikkenshitsu org len ...n org tu kata jyama nak pindah...so operasi yg sepatutya bermula esok itu tlh diawalkan...huihuihui...so td kami ber6 pun angkutlah mesin berat nanang yg mahai nak mapus seme org pun cuak...n then everyone was groaning ....

sesampai je kat kenkyushitsu...sensei dtg bwk kunci...jom kita tgk jikken shitsu n kenkyushitsu baru katanya...jd cm kengaku lak..n of course seme org ada idea tersendiri...nak susun cm ne brg2...clean slate lah katakan..

blk kenkyushitsu operasi buang brg bermula...brg nak pindah dr kenkyushitsu...3-4 kotak je...nande..ada cerita di sebaliknya yg masih belum boleh diceritakan di sini..

shibutsu masuk dlm kotak (kena angkat sendiri..waa waa waa)...n then tape up all the tables...so the drawers don't move...yg n gyoushasan tlg angkat...arigatainaaa..

esok jyunbi pindah jikkenshitsu lak...confirm kotor..all the minyak2..n the debu2....and the chemicals..and besi2

apa apa pun...i think i strained my neck already..balik tampal koyok...my lab mate nye jr plak luka(n dia x prsn..bila himo tu jd merah br dia tkejut...men...haih)

anyway...yg best psl pindah2 ni...you get to start over...seme org tgh tanoshimi...cm best je bilik sana...tp ting3 la...undou undou...hikhikhik..skali dok jikkenshitsu tingkat bwh je kan...

lately....

lately...
suka makan kek....biasanya kalau buat kek nak rasa je sebenarnya...yg len tu biar hubby hbskan...tp saikin..nak sgt mkn kek..smpi sanggup buat kek kul 12 mlm..panas2 lg ngappp...last friday buat kek jugak tp sbb dah bwk gi toyo...tk terpikir nak tapau blk fukui skit...n so today..because naaaak sgt mkn kek tp dah tak larat blk kenkyu buat kek instant...haha..why instant? sbb pki tepung ホットケーキkira cm men tipu la kan....hahaha..n so skang tgh ngap marble kek instant perisa milo n kopi...don't ask mana dtg kombinasi tu...sbb kopi hubby n milo depan mata kot...hahaha

lately...
suke men game pc...balik kenkyu je main..blk kenkyu je main..

lately...
rasa nak buang brg...buang brg...tp tak terbuang gak...sbb last2 sayang...

lately...
banyak kluar duit pasal wheelie...betul ckp kak miza..kereta=$$$

lately...
takut big cars...even though i dream of owning one...sbb dah terbiasa bwk kete kecik kot

lately...
susah nak keluar dr shower....because the warm water feels oh so good...

lately...
i wish somebody would come up with super thin tapi super warm gloves yg transparent so that nobody knows tha i'm wearing them (tak bley pki gloves masa buat jikken)...because my fingers get so cold they turn numb masa buat jikken...kenapalah tak de danbou dlm koujyou tu

lately...
i feel like calling up a lot of people but i never do...skype blocked my account...siot tul..sape ntah hack..

lately....

my latest toy....

say hello to mister pasta roller....my latest toy in the kitchen... got all hyped up about ravioli... really wanted to taste the thing...but you see ...most ravioli that is sold in cans or n frozen form..is not halal...and kat jepun ni..lagi susah nak cari..

so i do what i always do...i make it myself... but i'll never know what it's really supposed to taste like lah kan..when u take the original recipe and take out the prosciutto...and alcohol...but you make do with what you can use...right...

so anyway..since i was dying to make that thing...first came the search for a round cutter...cookie cutter pun blh...tp nak cr a big sized circle cutter was not an easy chore...cr kat fukui ..then cr kat toyo..ada yang mahal je..last2 beli jugak...sekali..last weekend kat 100円 jusco to baru keluar stok....three sizes for 105円...urghhh..geram geram....hahaha...

the thing about making home made pasta is that...serious mendokusai nak roll out the dough...so i thought..why not invest in a pasta roller...saje je la usha2 kat tnet...and there it was...on sale...from 5800 to 1890...ape lagi ...beli beli...hahaha 2000 yen je...my hubby ..said beli je la...haha...and i was really proud of it too...sampai lah the night when i called up my mum for a chat... and she was like...you can get that for rm 30-40 in msia...waa waa waaaa......terus down..she had a laugh though..and i begged her not to tell dear hubby coz nanti kena gelak je.....but he overheard..so double kena gelak...hahaha..tp tak pe...i'm happy with my new toy and that's what counts...

my mum gave me some ideas too....al though i have thought of using it to roll out gyouza (potstickers) dough... she said why not use it to roll out you karipap dough...hehe....but it's the taste that counts right...so dearest hubby can't grumble bout me buying mister pasta roller...heck he might want to help me roll it out...maybe even try to figure the mechanics of the thing.....

so then comes the search for the perfect fresh pasta recipe...i had one in mind...the one my jamie oliver recipe book...tp it's a bit too ambitious for me...and some of the stuff tak tau nak cr kat mane kat fukui ni..

yesterday tnet buat pasal ...tak leh load page allrecipes...so here i am ...searching...

found one that's seems to have potential with an in-experienced pasta maker...and here it is basic pasta

hopefully it turns out nice....still thinking up ideas for the ravioli fillings though...the possibilities are endless...

somebody stole our wedding presents...boohooohoooo

it happened a few weeks ago...called home and found out..

ada pencuri masuk ...through the front kitchen door yg mengadap main road tu....dulu masa umah baru siap someone tried to masuk through the window next to it...tp fortunately masa tu kitorg tak pindah sana agi...

it happened on a sunday..of all days..in broad daylight...tak ke pelik...weekend yang biasanya org kat rumah tu lah dia pilih nak pecah rumah...thank God everyone was out...it chills me even to think abut what would have happened kalau ada sape2 kat rumah...since majority penghuni rumah tu females... the funny thing is my dearest hubby, was thinking in a different way...he was thinking about how to detain the pencuri if he was home at the time...men!...sheeeesh...

our neighbour was baffled since he was at home and didn't hear a thing..... according to the detective  four other houses were robbed that day in that area..and the funny thing is ...they said they were in the area...scouting...and still the robbery occured...huhuhu...benda dah nak jadi kan...

anyway....they rummaged through our closets..throwing our clothes in a  heap on the floor...and my mum said she didn't have the strentgh to clean my room just yet but that after looking through our things, she  found that some of our wedding presents were gone....since the stuff was still in their packaging.. i guess the thieves figured they could sell them....bedsheets, towels, blah blah blah..... i'm just glad they didn't take the songkets. tapi sedih jugak lah... especially the towels that my seniors gave us that were monogrammed with our names and little notes of advice was stolen...urghhh geram tak reti baca ke org tu...ada nama saya kat atas towel tu...pun nak ambik ke...

my mum...well some jewllery she left at home including my bracelet that i asked her to repair...and some of mums brooches...(which my mum thinks shows that one of the theives was a women...coz her brooches yang org tu tak berkenan ada kat dlm bathroom depan cermin...suggesting that the person was trying them out)...and what made my mum really mad ...was her prized perfumes...one of which my daddy just gave her for her birthday...

maa naaa....all in all i was pretty shocked ...since i have never actually been robbed.... and mad...can't forget that part ...i was mad...but Mr.A said...rather than being mad, wouldn't it be better if you prayed that they never do it again...

and that's when i new i married the right man

The Name Game

So i got tagged ...a long long time ago....

Well here goes



1.YOUR REAL NAME
Syazwani Binti Mohd Najib


2.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME:(mother and fathers name)
Faridah Aini Mohd Najib


3.NASCAR NAME:(first name of your mother's dad, father's dad)
Muhammad Abdul



4.STAR WARS NAME:(the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name)
Mohsy



5.DETECTIVE NAME:(favorite color, favorite animal)
Red horse



6.SOAP OPERA NAME:(middle name, town where you were born)
Binti KT



7.SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd fav color, fav drink, add "THE" to the beginning)
The Brown Sirap Limau




8.FLY NAME:(first 2 letters of 1st name, last 2 letters of your last name)
Syib




9.ROCK STAR NAME:(pets name, current street name)
Mei San cho me Jyuu Hachi




10. PORN NAME: (1st pet, street you grew up on)
Capu Memanda 12




11.YOUR GANGSTA NAME:(first 3 letters of real name plus "izzle")
Syaizzle



12.YOUR GOTH NAME:(black, and the name of one of your pets)
Black Itamu




13. STRIPPER NAME: (name of your fav perfume, fav choc)
Miracle Bounty....(wahahahahaha)



14. WIZARD'S NAME: (last 3 letters of mother's name, first 3 letters of current job, first 3 letters of your zodiac sign and last 3 letters of home street's name)
Dahstusagchi



15. PIRATE'S NAME: (fav actor last name, your 'pet' name, fav actress last name, add "Captain" at the beginning)
Captain Dempsey Anie Hunt






 I, Syaizzle, hereby tag the people who read this.

Sincerely,
Captain Dempsey Anie Hunt

me no likey how me look

okay.... i always revert to titles that are bunpoutekini salah when i am upset...

raya tahun ni...i should be happy...first raya as a wife lah kan... i was happy...up to the point when glance at the raya photos that show up on facebook and friendster and flicker and blah blah blah...

then i just get depressed....

it doesn't matter how good i feel when i leave the the house before the event ...bila tgk gambar i'm so like....whaaaatttt...FAAAAATTTTT...

that's what screams through my head...

n then there was the time kat rumah kak zeti in toyohashi...her mother came to visit from malaysia..and we arrived at the open house a bit early...so the ones that were there were all the families...budak bujang tak sampai lagi...so naturally the conversation lead to children...and the mother was asking the other wives anak brapa and they talked about their children and pregnancies and then she turned to me ..what bout you...anak brapa?.....hah? i look like someone's mum already ke? i turned to her and said uhmm...saya baru je kahwin..and another wife noted my still 'inai'ed fingers....that was blow number one

yesterday kat jamuan raya fukui...hana-chan was crying...as usual...she doesn't like crowds plus she was sleepy...and i happened to lalu in front of the father at that time...pas tu one of the guys said...takut tak syaz?

what is there to be scared about....a crying kid? (well maybe if i was the one who made her cry, intentionally. kalau cm tu takut la kot)...blow number 2

n then later that night...dearest hubby called his mum up to thank her for the raya parcel...and she asked him 'syazwani tak lekat lagi ker?'.....owhhhhh....blow number 3...bam bam booom

i wasn't prepared for that.. i mean we've only been married for 1 month and 4 weeks...i know that's ample time...but we don't live together.. talk about pressure....pressure...

tak tahu mcm mana nak explain the feeling...i thought we should just let nature run it's course..you know...actually trying for it to happen...because people expect it of you...well that just feels like ...well sitting for an exam.... pressure ...pressure....i didin't know they expected me to be 'carrying' already.... now it just feels like pressure..

and the yesteday...while 'skype'ing with A...i really didn't like how i looked..and i started picking up the dumbells....urgh...depression plus pressure..not a good mix

me no likey how me look

dah crowded balik

yup...sem 2 dah start..
you know how org kl yg beraya di kl slalu ckp 'oh kl dah jam balik' after raya...well that's how i'm feeling right now..

after sebulan lebih gi skool...org tak de..toilet kosong...senyap sunyi jer....and jikken pun juncho sbb senior tak de keje lain except..buat jikken with yours truly..

well sekarang...the kanteen is congested...nak amik duit pun beratur...toilet tak yah ckp lah kan...and sbb senior dah start kelas balik...jikken ku tergendalaaaaaa.....arghhh...dia tak pe la got one more year for jikken...i've got less then 2 months okay

the only down part of coming to skool masa natsu (other then it being natsu bila org len cuti) was the fact that kanteen tu bukak tgh hr je...tp puasa right so tak lah terasa sgt..tp bila kena stay back? berlapar lah aku sampai balik..

another thing...masa natsu nak berselisih ngan budak msia sorg pun payah...today...selisih ngan 4 budak msia within 10 minutes after i stepped out of my house...sorg on the way, sorg kat tepi kanteen, sorg masa tgh amik duit, sorg masa tgh jln ke lab...

dah crowded balik...

hisa bisa no tetsuya

i typed this long entry just now..and i ter delete everything...this is why sometimes i hate using noDell..i accidentally brushed my palm against the mouse thingy and poof...hbs hilang everything...

tp because i was writting about something yang tak best mls nak rewrite...baik spare you guys from all the icky memories kan...

speaking of icky memories ...this one i can't get out of my mind...i was disgusted...
one of my fellow B4 guys....well he's one of the well composed guys..so i thought he would be more mature..tp...i guess guys will be guys kan

kalau ye lah pun ...keep your porn n whatsoe ever to urself lah...
tak yah lah bawak datang gakko ...geli tau..

his screensaver was of a girl showing her titties everywhere...dah lah kalau bukak pintu lab tu terus nampak com dia...bukan i wanted to see it pun it was there staring back at me...eeeeewww.tak mo igt dah..

lps ni bukak pintu kena tgk lantai lah...

so guys please... keep your stuff to yourselves...
i takmo tgk...

anyway ter'stray' lak from the original to
tp tak pe lah kan

to my senior FF....keep up the good work ..tok sah pikir bout what everyone says...practice makes perfect kan..i don't think BB minds..

to my senior N...my hubby pun keluar nomikai gaks malam nie...phm sgt the feeling ... tp apakan daya...hahahaha

first saturday.....alone????

ok tak de lah alone....ada michelle

first saturday tanpa A di sisi since we got hitched...
so since tak de A...kita buat benda girly2 with michelle... a.k.a shopping
semlm gi umah kak azah...and we were watching tv while si kecik hana tu tidoq sat..and there was an iklan.... nitori sale...jom jom ...i said ..
tp pikir2 balik..what am i doing going to nitori ( kedai jual stuff for dlm rumah...jual brg2 cm kat ikea lah... cadar, couches, curtains, blah blah blah) i'm supposed to be 'kurang'ing my brg dlm umah...
well ingtkan nak beli anniversary gift for my dear A...tp tak leh bg tau beli ape ...nanti thrill lah....hahaha

anyway..shopping shopping...

buka puasa at saize je... but it was a change..lama sangat tak mkn luar ok..
and we pigged out on a lot of stuff...siap take away pizza for sahur....hahaha

balik2 stop at courant d'air..beli gula (nak bake bake bake....hahaha) n off to uni qlo... igt nak beli inner long sleeve...

but then i think it was because i was kenyang...dok depan rack tu punyalah lama...skali tak beli pape pun....haha

got home called the parentals and guess where they were? KFC....just the 2 of them igtkan it was my sis's idea....i guess grown ups pun kekadang nak mkn KFC eh....

anyway..it was my parents first time nak call i pkai Skype ( tanpa supervision daughters diorg) ..and i sent them my wedding pics and they read out the wedding cards for 2 of my classmates masa kat mrsmkt dulu....congrats Farha n Ina....dua2 kahwin after raya nanti...semoga berbahgia ke akhir hayat...

anyway A pulak with his guy friends enjoying bola mlm ni...thankful he's got his guys...i wouldn't be good company kalau dia nak tgk match...hahaha

well adios people

3 weeks and 3 days later....part two...the first advice

3 weeks 3 days later....busy pikir menu raya...ape yang ok ek? kena factor in yang bilik ari ada satu dapur je...n only one small periuk and one small fry pan..guess i'll have to bring the pots and pans and bla bla bla la kot...n then kena pikir pasal time...if raya on sunday..and kitorg bertolak from fukui on saturday..leaves with how much time to cook....pikir2 plan2..

my first raya as a wife...I'm TRYING to do it right... even made kuih raya tau (no kuih tunjuk2...hahaha)..but they didn't turn out that well.... tp dah A mintak Almond London kan... he's a chocolate lover...i'm NOT... i don't even like almond london..it's the one biscuit raya kat umah that i NEVER touch... so A better eats his fill of them...comot looking and all

anyway back to part two...the first advice

so it was the day after we arrived in Malaysia... A was staying in Shah Alam at R's house for a couple of days.. nak last minute shopping..the final barang hantaran...my shoes..
kitorg dah round the nearest outlets Nagashima 'twice' , Toki and so on ...still tak jumpa yang berkenan di hati..

last2 cari kat sogo je la... my parents drove me there..mula2 nak suruh naik komuter je..tp sbb nana pun nak beli kasut..so babah pun ckp everyone goes... so seme org pun ikut la..

so pusing2 sogo..disappointed...tak banyak choice..naik second floor..lg tak lawa..was contemplating on KLCC　or midvalley...last2 turun balik first floor...skali nana dah beli my first choice....cheh...melepas lah plak...n then ended up try kasut in front of the whole family..

n then babah goes and whispers to A... cakap je lawa..nanti sampai petang kat sini..
n there it goes 'the first advice' from father to son... kalau ikut shopping...just tell them what they want to hear....hahahaha

by the way.. i wore those shoes masa balik to japan...and habis melecet..tu lah sapa suruh tak break them in dulu kan.. my bad

dreams...

i had a weird one this morning....

it started out with me in a dilapidated 'typical sekolah menengah in Malaysia' building....and it was run over by teen yakuzas....somehow i recognized the school as my highschool (b4 i masuk mrsm...aminuddin baki)...i was running trying to break free from their cluthces..and suddenly i was accompanied by another boy also running away...bila sampai courtyard sekolah tu i read the nameplate and it read ' sekolah seri puteri'...what the? bila sampai sini lak ni...kebetulan sekolah tu ada marathon....ape lagi join la...anything to get away from those nasty boys chasing me...lari lari lari..tup tup my adik was running alongside me....tapi dia disqualifed...sbb tak ikut the right arah panah....they had these weird coloured anak panahs all over the place marking routes...and you're running so fast ...susah nak pick up the different colors...and then guess what...i made it to the finish line and it was euphoric experience...tak menang pun tak pe...but i made it...and the boy who broke free from the school with me was there at the finish line...catching me in his bear hug ....and then i was at family kenduri or something...and allthough the surroundings were oh - so - malaysia....my head recognized it as a gathering in gifu...where somebody was handing a baby to someone else...and that somebody happened to be my ex-roomate who now stays in gifu and who hasn't spoken or returned my mail for a long time...and there was shock in her face...like i wasn't supposed to be there...oh ya when i entered the room i was with one of my best friends H who is currently in msia....they exchanged a confused glance that showed that they had been communicating...all my batchmates have...i was the only one left out of the loop...apparently...she doesn't want to see me anymore...doesn't want to have anything to do with me ...and so on...i excepted that rather well...pulled her into a tight hug and said ' hug me cause this will be the last time' and suddenly we were both crying..i hugged her again and left...knowing that would be the last time...and then i started running again.....sampai pantai...which i recognized as pantai batu buruk kat tganu...where he was waiting to catch me as i jumped of a decaying tree trunk straight into his arms....

what a dream huh....sometimes i think dreams are triggered by what we see or experience b4 we sleep...how true that is i wouldn't know..for example... A was talking to me about the upcoming Gifu taikai...and i was thinking about the chances i would see my ex-roomate..the weird arrows masa tgh marathon tu... i think those are the arrows that i passed by while driving on the highway semlm...H..i was thinking about her when i passed toyota on the way back to fukui..running..that was just me enjoying the speed ...i think...cause i LOATHE running..

all in all....this dream is still stuck in my head...and i can't get it out....the running ....the jumping and soaring through the air....it was just too great to forget i guess

2 weeks and 6 days later....part one ..the journey home

even to this day it feels surreal...i'm married...i'm a wife...



been busy these last few weeks sampai tak dan dan nak post an entry...what with catching up at lab..and running to and fro from toyohashi...

so here's a re-cap of the events b4 the big day...
A and I left Japan on the 9th...plan asalnya nak naik densha kul 4 pg to Kansai...but after some deliberations and recalculations...we decided it would be cheaper and less hassling to just drive there (note that it's only cheaper if it were more than 1 person and you drive there on weekends coz highway 1000yen je) kalau tak..better take the train guys...anyway left Fukui at 2 am and we arrived there around 8...wasn't supposed to take that long..tapi jam terukkkkk sgt (for Japan standards) and I stopped to nap..anyway got there and handed over wheelie chan to the pak cik parking who'll be taking care of her for the next 13 days...he drove us over to the terminal and the usual pre-flight hussle commenced...dah check-in br leh relax...yeay..

fly fly fly

and finally we reached Malaysia...klakar tak yang only Malaysians were spooked about the H1N1 thing...the japs tak bother pun nak put on masks or whatever...but taking precaution is important don't you think... guess what my family was betting on wheteher i'd be wearing a mask or not....hahaha

anyway...A had his liquid stuff in my large luggage bag so we headed off to the side so we could retrieve it...and masa tu lah the tiny kunci nak hilang......whaaaaaattttt...cuak gile kat situ...cr cr cr punyalah cr... 15 minutes and 1 torn bag later barulah jumpa...woishhhhh...fiuhhh

it was the first time A met my parents....he was waiting for R to pick him up..so my dad decided that he'd park and we'd have a light meal together...just to pass the time...everything was going well i guess...it being his first encounter and everything...bet his heart was just thumping away huh....dia nye turn la plak...the first time i met his mom i counldn't sleep soundly for to nights prior to the meeting....hahaha

anyway part 1 is over...and i need to get back to my lab work...

kandou sat

i wasn't expecting it....not from them

hari ni pergi lab anticipating another day dalam fukui dai nye oven...a.k.a. bengkel kat hujung sana tu...dtg2 my senior wasn't here yet...go fihure..and i thought i was late..

lepak lepak sat...tetibe..suzuki san (dak M2 yang slalunya tak berkata pape..tp great at what he does) panggil..'Syazwani san..anno..kore ha minna kara no kekkon iwai desu' (Syazwani..ni ada sikit wedding present from us)..speechless aku..from kitorg seme...sensei sekali datte..i wasn't expecting it..not from these japs..yg seme nye mania...mania PSP, mania soccer, mania softball, mania Digimon, mania anime, mania buat kerja ulang2 pun ada.

kandou sekejap aku...

tanoshimi nk bukak dgn ari nanti...along with urs aan...been saving it ..

when i'm busy

why aa...bila busy la my jari gatal nak menaip....
time hima tak nak lak write pape kat
sini....

anyways i'm suppose to be super busy doing something else right now....namely GETTING READY FOR TOMORROW'S PRESENTATION....tapi apakan daya...i needed a break from thinking about wheels wheels wheels....haha

tapi my senior bagi link about aizdean...i didn't know who he was until i opened that link...my senior rupanya..singer cum dak masters..hebat deshou...n apa yg lg hebat..org jepun pun kenal dia...debut album in japan..the first to do so at that...

anyways...punyala lama tak tengok blog...anyway recap of what's happened since i've been gone

congrats again to mrs. FF and CH...Darwish cute sangat..putih lak tu...hidung ikut papa dia(i think)..panggil ape ek? papa n mama eh?

hagil got married

loko and bad had their first anniversary

nurul went to see KL tower again

the nagaoka gurls went n nari2 (mesti best kan)

dart dah gi kursus kahwin n got the job at panasonic ...congrats!!!!

my mami's rabbits gave birth to a litter of seven (1 died)

ari dah habis present so he's free...ape lagi ek

anyway....today i
finished my abstract...tried my best to get that SW done....bertekak no silap2 'bermesyaurah' with my senior...masuk bengkel yang mcm oven to re-pasang the servo press machine...and came home at 8pm (the latest so far)..i know iknow ...org len balik lg lambat...haha

so now that i'm feeling better i guess it's time to get back to my final report and start renshu for tomorrow's presentation...
yeay

Let'S feel good about ourselves today

I'm not a fan of self help books...I tend to think that they are quite repetitive..and in the end makes me feel worse about myself...

However, I think they got it right when they were talking about smiles...
F san ( my 'dearest' senior) smiled at lab today...smiled because of what, you ask..sbb the chemicals for our collaborative research with Daido dah sampai...macam budak baru dapat present..he reverently took out one bottle after another..smilling this bright smile...kalau chemical je yang sampai happy cam tu, jikken souchi dah siap nanti dunno lah happy tahap mana dia...well any way his happiness berjangkit to me an despite the various problems i'm trying to conquer...today seems like a beautiful day...a day to feel good about myself...

kadang2 rasa down because I still haven't figured out what my calling is in life..I read my friend's blog today...things rarely turn out how you expect them to do...usually taking you through a forest of thorns first...but she's gotten through her rough part in life and now has managed to find herself..nanka urayamashi pun ada..otona dah kawan2 aku skang kan..hayaku jibun wo mitsukaritai naa...

pagi tadi dpt call from sensei yang tantou shukatsu (sensei in charge of employment)..'u dah dapat kerja lom?' ... and I was like NO!!!... so what are you gonna do? ohh no...ape aku nak jawab ni..telling your friends and family what you're gonna do is one thing..nak cakap kat sensei hmmm...susah ar ckit.. sayang was on skype at the moment so he heard the whole conversation. I told my teacher ..balik Msia nanti I cari..he let it go at that..tapi still..I kinda felt like it was a lie..I'm not going back yet...and I couldn't be truthful bout that..what la..

back to feeling good about ourselves

jom kawan2

iki wo tsutte....
haaahh

be happy bout urselves and what you've accomplished in life so far


p.s: tgh happy coz minggu ni i managed to stop myself from buying anything the jihanki...haha..it's an addiction

another 40 minutes....

40 minutes je lagi and all i want to do is get it over and done with...

org sebelah siap blh snooze lagi..punya lah unaffected diorg by the upcoming presentation...

sometimes i wich they wouldn't give big names to these events...it doesn't help with the level of stress...中間発表 kedebak gitu...oh jap..tambah 会 kat belakang tu and it sounds so serious...but my labmates aren't taking it seriously are they? 2 snoozing..1 playing PSP the other..tak tau dia tgh buat pe..and me..typing..taking a break from my continuos renshu dr td..sampai dh muak tgk my slides...

just looking forward to turning in early today...

a friend said..always pray for the best...maybe i should take her advice

yea yea

malam ni nak pi tgk hawwy powte...

almost makes up for spending the day at lab....

yea yea....nak pi tgk hawwy pow te...huhu

jangan mare

uhh..somebody push me

I'm not a fan of doing research....I don't enjoy it....and getting out of bed in the morning to face another day in that lab is getting so hard to do...next Tuesday i have my mid-term presentation and I haven't even started on my PP slides...

urghh...I'm scared that one day I'll just up and go..mls lah nak gi hari ni and don't even bother to show up at lab...seriously..because if you do it one time..the next time it won't be so hard to resist to do so...scary la

so somebody .. anybody please give me a little push... just as long as it's not over a ledge

Haha..salah salah...

Hahahaha
Kelakar how sometimes people think they know what you're thnking. And how they get into this big speech to try to cheer you up...I appreciate the sentiment..showing that you care. Tapi sometimes I just can't help myself bust crack up inside...

The other night, after car trouble and dinner, we were on our way home and I was silently watching the scenery pass by when U said, aku tahu ko ada masalah Syaz, benda cam ni memanglah susah. And I was like ape dia ' I look upset ke?' and on and on he goes about how he noticed what was happening at the fami-resu, and how there are all types of people in the world and if there wasn't then the world would be dull. And how we have to learn to adapt ourselves in order to peacefully coexist and so on and so forth
and then i said ' no you've got it wrong' and he starts hinting at maybe it's concerning the august thing. and i said..tak de kena mengena ngan my sayang or our wedding...i was cracking up inside...serious nak gelak....tp kesian la kan..he was doing his best...trying to cheer me up. so i just smiled and angguk2

so what was it ? what was going through my head?
persoalan : esok nak pi umi tak? funds cukup tak? kalau pi report sempat siap tak?

i guess my forehead was really wrinkled...I'm a serious person..I think hard...hahahaha

tp ter'touch' lah my hati kejap...untung Miss A dapat U..

wedding kompangs

let's just be sure that there won't be any bells around...kompangs however would do just nicely..



after being happily busy for the weekend and ignoring blog reading and my research, i finally took a glimpse at my dashboard today, reading past entries of my fellow friends ...



a dear friend aan wrote about wedding bells and such.. writting about yours truly, touching my heart in ways some of you can just imagine...



yes, it's been years, years since i have done the crazy dance (some of you who have never seen the 'real' me would be shocked), but she still remembers. she remembers the stories of my daddy dearest who up to this day still mesin rumput , does the gardening and the laundry with his shirt tucked in (I've noticed that the only time he doesn't tuck it in is when he's wearing baju batik). About the joke, i think he's forgotten about that. It turns out that my siblings are more you know 'open' about stuff than I am..so he's probably used to it. hahaha



aan was there when it all started between me and my sayang..some could say that's how it started. That summer when aan and the gang decided to pay a visit to Yuge, simultaneously throwing Ari and myself into the preparations for their arrival.



who would have guessed that 2++ years later that this is where we would all stand. I sometimes see myself floating quietly in calm waters while my friends speed by in motor boats, others swimming at speeds that would shame the world record holders. Chasing theirs dreams, in ways only they know how.



Everyone has a path to follow. That is now clear to me. Not everyone can do what others do and enjoy it. Everything I'm saying might be atarimae , but I didn't see it as thus when I was younger. I thought if you can do it, I can too. That might be true, but I now know my limitations, and my strong points. My parents say 'you're old enough to think on your own'. I'm trying my best to do that now.



I choose to marry at this point in my life. I have chosen to stay home for a year after I finish my degree while he finishes his masters. I have chosen to make the best out of that time.



People may disagree with this decision, saying I could do more with my life in that one year. I'll be behind my batchmates career wise. That's all I'm hearing nowadays. Career, career, career. Someone says that I'm just tired. Trying to run away with settling for mediocre jobs with no challenges, saying I'll get bored after a few months. Imyself was once scared that my brain would just rust up and once I do try to enter the working world I'd be just that .. a rusted tin-man. Well...every decision has it's risks...And I have chosen



It was different in high school..everyone was going through the same thing and you could compare. Nowadays, all I can do is watch, and lend an ear to my dear friends, whatever road you might choose, be it the road to higher learning in Malaysia,Japan, US, UK or anywhere else, be it jobs in Dubai, be it family life, super careers in new sciences and groud breaking research..ooen shiteimasu yo..zutto..even lumpy people are watching..dearest friends..



My only wish is that i do not fade..that I do not get caught up in my new life that I forget you dear friends.

dup dap dup dap....

bukak calendar today...another 46 days to go

all this while S asyik tanya the same thing everytime he sees me...ko tak takut ke..and the answer I usually give him is 'ask me that again bila tinggal seminggu ke 3 hari ke b4 the big day'..sekarang I feel fine...joyfully awaiting the moment when finally become man and wife...It's a big step...kahwin ni bukan main main..it's a big business...and even though some might look at me and think I'm treating the matter as something small and simple ,something I agreed to on a whim..well, it's not...I have thought about the matter over over..weighing the pros and cons...and putting aside my list of things I want to do before I get married and so on...when I say putting aside I mean it..I have not thrown them away..I'll just change the list name to 'my list of things to do when the time is right'..haha...I thought some of them will be unachievable after I get married, but a friend, dear Safra has opened my eyes and shown me a road which I may choose to take one day..As for my sayang..I have talked to him about these lists and says he will support me when I choose to undertake them once again...sayang my sayang...haha...

anyways...bukan the big day je ada count down...thesis pun ada...as days go by and our time shortens it becomes unnerving...and baffling...I've been reading the blogs of my friends who are at he moment going through the same thing..some have it worst then others...everyone writting about their problems and how they are dealing with it...tricks to cope with stress and anger...I read and I remind myself not to be too negative (I'm always complaining about something)..my lab is one of the more lenient ones...

my sensei recently gave a warning to me and my sempai...get it done in two weeks he says....or else it won't be done in time for your presentation...dup dap dup dap lagi

td masa zemi he said we're gonna have chukan happyo (mid term presentation) where we are supposed to show what we have done so far and another one in august....i don't have anything to show for now..since what we have been showing him every week since may has not been good enough...dup dap dup dap lagi..

i dodged a bullet today..well not literally...sensei tetiba ada outstation..so my turn to present is next week..時間が一週間伸びたんだー...haha..happy nyer saya

well...the dup dap dup daps are increasing in speed...maybe i should take a page out of aan's book and enjoy life ..flaws and all..

as for the 46 days to go...
my whole family is getting the preparations done...a million thanks to my mami dearest, who accompanied me masa pilih kain, who has patiently made my bunga pahar ( i repeat MADE them herself), went out and found a venue, chosen my reception menu and my wedding cards (which baru siap), and a lot more while recuperating from her painful back condition.

thanks tu babah for putting up with mami, i know it must not have been easy, and contributing the idea for the montage, i thought your silence meant you didn't care, actually you were silently watching the proceedings, and supporting mami all the way, i love your idea for the montage , more than you know

thanks to nana.. who is undertaking the montage project, and your openness about the whole hing...

and thanks to syira...the one who gets more excited then me sometimes..which is a good thing..i tend to be too quiet most of the time...

a world of tahnks for you people...love you lots..muahh

diorang tak perasan i wasn't there....hahahaha

once a month budak2 kikai (mech) kena buat 草むしり(gotong royong) around kawasan sekolah...
senior dah cakap semlm and the day before...kul 12 g センター(stands for center- but in our case it refers to the plaec where all the big machines are) gi angkat komputer katanya...and then kul 1 ada gotong royong datte...

and me being me..was swept up in the preparations nak grk gi yokohama mlm ni...dh lah pagi td bangun lambat ...gi kelas swoh swah swoh swah idung..(yeah my nose gets runny in the morning)..zenzen tak pay attention to class insei (dak masters) tu..and i was the only one lak tu..dak b4 (bachelor 4 year) sekor pun tak mai kelas...so hbs je kelas tu yours truly ni ngan best ne pecut balik umah nak kemas brg (tu lah semlm tak pack siap2) haha...kemas kitchen(can't leave the kitchen cm tu je..dah summer ni..nati balik ada big mess)..pas tu g kombini bayar ticket bas...tup tup dah 2.30 pm...arghhh yabbei...maa ii ka

so i was rushing to lab right..guess what...kenapa banyak sangat beg plastic berisi rumput ni?...ohhhh s****...i forgot..gotong royong..tp dh tak de org..dah hbs ke...double s****...mcm mana nak face dak kenkyu ni...

bukak pintu lab terus bow n ckp...'sumimasen..wasuremashita...kyou nanka atta yo ne...chou wasureta'..senior M2(masters second year) gelak je..dak2 len pun...my senior M1 je masam..as always....

when all the seniors left masuk bengkel and what not..i turned to my fellow b4's and asked them..'did they say anything?'..and guess what they said' ii yo...sebenarnya...kitorg tak prsn pun you tak de masa gotong royong and angkat computer tu....lg pun kitorg tak g class pagi td..so..kosong kosong la ek'...hahah..

diorg tak perasan i wasn't there...is that good or bad?



p.s.:..hari ni seme org cabut blk awal..even my senior M1 ..mezurashi naaa...seme org yasumi kibun da ne

progress

progress for the sake of progress should be stopped...

anyone care to explain?

let's talk about something nice today...

let's talk about something nice today...

let me divert my attention to nice things so that i can calm down...
let's talk about the angin sepoi sepoi bahasa that was oh sooo soothing masa tgh tunggu S td..
let's talk about the feeling of food going into an empty stomache...
let's talk about arriving home and putting down the schoolbag in a corner and lying down and think about nothing for awhile...
let's talk about getting in the shower and letting all the tensions of the day flow down the drain with the water...
let's talk about getting to see him this weekend...

let's talk about something nice...

long time no glimpse into lumpkins life.....

esok chukan (mid terms), meeting with sensei (second time sbb sensei was not happy with our first one on monday)....
pg td kenkyu shoukai (intro to my lab) for budak first year..
ptg ni 6.00 ptg ~ seminar...

nak update blog...no time..patutnya study skang ni..but i'm taking a break..
so many things have happened these last few weeks...dak dak fukui kerjanya weekend je ada something going on...last saturday was the kenduri kesyukuran budak yonnen(fourth year)..kenduri kesyukuran dapat naik final year...baru naik..huhu..belum leh grad lagi...

a lot of 'nasihat's were given to the younger ones..and so on and so forth..had a fun time jumping on this huge white thing..dah almost 24 pun nak main jump2 cm bdk2..but it's fun ok...

pg td nye kenkyu shokai...hmmm..not fun..stay up smlm to get ready for it until 3 am..pg td bangun sambung prep lg..and today hisahiburini..masuk lab on time kay...hurray to me..why not so fun? my senior suka change the things i do last minute...lg 2 minutes nak happyo dia leh suruh tukar genkou (script)... aiseh..kalau saya nak happyo in malay tak pe r gak..ini japanese k..u want me to goreng ayat there n then..ada kot amongst you guys out there who can do that...but well let's just say i'm not one of them..

today ada 6 groups budak fist year..after each of the first three groups mesti ada something my senior nak i change...urghhh..that's why it was not fun..so for the first years yg tak fhm ape yang saya cuba sampaikan td..sorry ekkk...

well next week ada another three groups..and my senior is changing the presentation scheme again ( no surprise there).. don't mistake me..he's a nice guy..just suka tukar fiiran last minute...and not good at telling me what he wants..tu je..arghh ape ni..habs resolution tu stop being negative...

maa maa..one step a day kanaa...

ijyou watashino happyou wo owarasete itadakimasu...

???what r they up to???

i got a call from my sayang at 2.05 am last nite...dah tdo sedap masa tu ...so when i got to lab this morning what was going through my head was ' is this for real?' or was it just a dream

he said he got an offline message from his sis..saying my parents are going over to his house tomorrow...meaning TODAY...why do I know nothing about this?????

the three of them mami, babah, n syira...what are they up to?? normal ke parents going over to the future in-laws's without the bride and groom knowing???

not welll....

i'm not well...again...
tak best la being tak well....
spent majority of the weekend in nest of a bed...
sbb can't be bothered to cook..breakfast lunch and dinner for today?
cornflakes...hey at least i ate something right...
but then again i threw out half of it just now...but who wants to hear about the gory details huh..no one..so i'll spare you..

adios guys..back to my nest..

94

94 days to go....

how do i feel? pejam celik pejam celik...tinggal brapa bulan je lagi....hmmmm

a lot has been going on..but i haven't been able to get things back on track...usahkan di cakap hal kat kenkyu..kerja kerja rumah tu pun...hmm let's just say everything is in a mess..mcm mana ni 94 days to go syaz..lepas ni u have to pick after another person as well..double the mess to clean up tau...hye yahhhh..dah lah dua dua pun messy...

hopefully i'll change...but 94 days isn't much...a lot of things to accomplish...

what's happening at lab...well i finally got my research theme...buat wheels from magnesium...org dgr mcm impact dia tak lah se gah my previous research...but hey this time i have to design something...dulu banyak main chemicals, microscopes, 60 degree water baths..this time main with hot metals, solid works, various types of lubricants, machines that can bear hundreds of tons of force and very very hot stuff...

since last week was golden week..there wasn't much going on but on friday..gang..i got randomly picked as the first to present for our zemi (a class where we the students, take turns 'happyo'ing (presenting) topics picked out of a text book or thesis - varies according to lab senseis). aaahhh..yabei..dah lah banyak shiki (equations)..

so ahad and monday bertungkus lumus lah buat shoumei (proving) kenapa shiki tu jd cam tu...
masa ni lah terasa otak dah berkarat... nasib baik fukuyama-san (M1 senior that's in charge of me) tu orgnya baik n tolong ajar sikit.. tuesday pg b4 zemi g jumpa sensei..tanya soalan siap2...haha

sekali masa zemi ..sensei did all the talking..one and a half hours and he finished 2 bab..sasuga lecturer da ne...so my turn kena tunda next week..another few extra days for me to migaku (kilatkan) my very berkarat brain..and get the shikis perfect for next zemi...

other then that..kena pikir pasal design for the tanzou (forge) , next monday kena tunjuk.. solid works tutorials, blah blah blah...

ni nak panggil dart ni...bibik for hire ...bleh tlg handle my house.. sejam brapa?

missing my grandma

tok passed away on the 25th of January this year...and i wasn't around...the last time i saw her it was during summer hols..2 days after raya..she handed me some money ( even though i didn't need it) and she told me this might be the last time i see her..i pushed her remark aside saying that she was strong and i wanted to see her at my wedding...and i left malaysia just like that..not feeling any weight on my heart...careless to say the least..

that summer i spent the last few days b4 going back jotting down recipes my grandmother dictated to me..bersemangat lah tu nak collect recipe..she even asked me to buy things she normally doesn't eat..1kg of chicken wings..and she wanted me to buy arang..but i was afraid to drive babah's car..if only i knew ..i would have gone....just so that she could cook the chicken wings on the dapur arang..

today...while i was looking up new recipes (my sayang is coming for a visit).. i thought of her...sebaknya skrg...tp kalau meleh air mata ni malu kat senior...last year ...i was damn proud..coz i masak a kuih (bingka labu) without her help..just to show i her i have grown up..dah ada new recipes kali ni..tak leh dah nak share ngan tok...i miss you tok...very much

it's gonna be a long day...

yesterday went by in a whiz....
hari nie...hmmm...let's just say it's not looking that way...

time2 ni la terasa nak amik extra classes...semlm ada class..sensei suruh amik...and so gozen cam laju je....and then i was busy writting official letters...busy lagi...

today...tak de kerja (haha yeah right...kena baca ronbun)...but who looks forward to doing that right...and every five minutes feels like 20

was it my breakfast..is that what's making me sluggish...had oatbran..filling..but i'm sleepy..
or was it the fact that i tido balik after i woke up this morning...should make it a point to get up as soon as my eyes open up..and not put my head back on my pillow like i did today...

sleep is important you guys...no kidding...dr tahun lepas mezasu nak betulkan sleeping pattern..tp tak jd2 gaks...susah actually..

did you know that the amount of sleep a person needs varies? cara nak check...go to sleep and wake up naturally, meaning no alarm clocks, no wake up calls..wake up naturally...and count back the hours...that's how much sleep your body needs.

alamak...sensei masuk...cepat cepat!!!

and my name starts with n 'S'

'S Pandai dan tekun dalam mengejar cita-cita. Tidak suka pada orang yang suka memungkiri janji.Kelemahannya mudah tersinggung selain sukar menahan emosi. Jika sudah emosi marahnya meledak-ledak.'

i was passing through one of the blogs i follow....and came accross his latest n3...personaliti mengikut huruf pangkal nama...i usually don't pay much attention to this stuff...but hey..it's interesting sometimes when most of it mengena tepat pada batang hidung sendiri....

betul sgt2... i don't like people yang suka mungkir janji...ask my sayang he knows how mad i get when he forgets to do something he promised he would do...and yes i'm very the sensitif you know..huhu...and yes my emotions show clearly on my face...tak reti nak tahan....and yes when i get mad ..be aware...be very aware...huhu...don7t really know bout the first ayat though...

anyone interested to know what their 'letter' shows....go ahead and read on


A Ramah dan murah senyuman.Mereka juga pandai menyesuaikan diri dalam pergaulan selain bijaksana dan cerdas.Kelemahannya, sangat mudah berasa hati, dan mudah mengeluarkan kata-kata pedas ketika meluahkan perasaan marah. Meskipun begitu marahnya mudah reda.

B Selalu tenang dalam menghadapi masalah yang rumit dan membahayakan dirinya adalah ciri penampilannya.Mereka juga sangat setia dan penyabar, yang menjadikannya amat disenangi dalam pergaulan. Kelemahannya sangat mudah tersinggung.

C Ramah dan pandai berbicara.Ini yang menjadikannya popular di kalangan rakan-rakan. Mereka tidak bersungguh dalam bertindak dan selalu menganggap masalah yang dihadapi adalah remeh.

D Pendiam, bercakap hanya bila perlu. Sopan, berdisiplin dan kuat bekerja. Kelebihannya itulah yang menghasilkan kejayaan dalam mencapai cita-cita. Kelemahannya adalah selalu bimbang dan sukar mempercayai orang lain.

E Pandai dan penuh pertimbangan dalam menjalankan tanggung jawab. Sikapnya periang bila hatinya senang, tetapi suka berdiam diri apabila hatinya gundah dan boleh membuatkan hati orang lain terluka.

F Punya pendirian yang teguh, tidak mudah goyah dan keras kepala.Mereka juga sukar memaafkan.Tidak setia dan amat berhati-hati bila berbelanja.

G Kerap murung dan bersedih hati. Pendiriannya mudah dipengaruhi. Tekun belajar ketika rakannya bermalas-malasan dan sebaliknya suka bermalas-malasan ketika rakannya sedang tekun.

H Mudah simpati, bahasanya lemah-lembut. Tidak pernah melukai perasaan orang lain. Selalu tergesa-gesa dalam melakukan pekerjaan, suka berkhayal dan bercita-cita terlalu tinggi.

I Suka memendam perasaan dan permasalahan. Mereka juga mudah merasa curiga dan cemburu terhadap orang lain. Suka menangis.

J Ramah dan murah senyuman. Mereka juga pandai menyesuaikan diri dalam pergaulan. Mudah merasa ragu dalam membuat keputusan dan tidak tegas.

K Pandai berjenaka. Hari-harinya sentiasa ceria walaupun perasaannya gundah. Kelemahannya suka bercerita rahsia sendiri.

L Ramah dan pandai bergaul dan mempunyai ramai kawan. Tidak suka bergosip dan mencampuri urusan orang lain. Amat berhati-hati bila berbelanja. Kelemahannya tidak menepati masa.

M Pandai dan kreatif, suka kelembutan dan jika dikongkong, mereka akan memberontak. Senang dijadikan sahabat, kerana mereka tidak berkira. Kelemahannya boros dan keras kepala.

N Baik hati dan rapi dalam berpakaian. Mereka suka menghulurkan tangan menolong orang lain tanpa memikirkan balasan. Kelemahannya mudah bersedih hati dan kurang percaya diri.

O Serba boleh. Suka memendam perasaan dan permasalahan serta sukar mempercayai orang lain. Akibatnya ramai yang menggapnya sombong dan suka memilih teman.

P Pandai berjenaka dan selalu ceria. Punya banyak idea dan sangat kreatif. Sering melakukan sesuatu yang belum dilakukan orang lain. Agak pendendam dan boros.

Q Setia dan mudah memaafkan orang lain. Suka meluangkan waktunya untuk kawan-kawan. Keras kepala, sukar diatur dan mudah emosi.

R Pendiam dan bercakap hanya bila perlu. Tekun dengan kerja yang disukai dan bersungguh-sungguh dalam mengejar cita-cita. Suka mengkritik. Dan sukar mengawal bicara ketika marah.

S Pandai dan tekun dalam mengejar cita-cita. Tidak suka pada orang yang suka memungkiri janji.Kelemahannya mudah tersinggung selain sukar menahan emosi. Jika sudah emosi marahnya meledak-ledak.

T Sangat berdisiplin. Selalu mengerjakan sesuatu menurut aturan buku. Tidak suka mengelamun atau bermalas-malasan. Suka menonjolkan diri selain senang gugup, terutama bila bersalah.

U Suka berterus-terang dan menyendiri. Naif baginya merugikan orang lain. Tidak tahan dengan kritikan dan kurang pandai menyusun kata-kata jika berbicara didepan orang ramai.

V Tutur katanya lembut dan pemalu. Pandai meyesuiakan diri.Selain itu, mereka juga pandai menguasai orang disekitarnya dengan cerita-cerita yang memikat. Tidak suka berterus terang.

W Ramah dan mudah simpati. Sikapnya amat menawan. Punya toleransi yang tinggi dan ringan tangan. Keras kepala dan sukar diatur, tetapi hatinya boleh dilembutkan dengan kesabaran dan kelembutan.

X Budi pekertinya halus. Suka melakukan pekerjaan sosial. Mudah tersinggung dan tidak akan berbaik dengan mereka yang menyinggungnya.

Y Pendiam dan tidak suka menonjolkan diri. Ramai menganggapnya sombong walaupun sebenarnya mereka adalah sahabat yang baik. Tidak berani mengemukakan pendapat.

Z Pandai berjenaka dan menyesuaikan diri dalam pergaulan. Suka disapa terlebih dulu dan gemar menonjolkan diri.

And it starts again.....

Today...pukul 4.30...dak dak kikai yonnen kena panggil gi 223L...for what....kenkyuuhaizoku...kira hari penetapan lab lah...kitorg kat sini ada quota dak ryugakusei(foreign student) brapa org...kanendousei (dak repeat tahun) utk setiap kenkyu..so kitorg ni dr dulu dok bersembang la sesama sendiri nak masuk kenkyu mana...tak nak bg bertindan kan...tp apakan daya..it still happens...

masa first kibou (first pemilihan) , sensei list ar semua org nak masuk kenkyu mana ikut ranking...kenkyu yg kita nak masuk tu..sensei nak 5 org (and only 2 org ryugakusei + kanendousei) and yang mintak 7 org...so masa second kibou tu kena pikir balik la...i took my chances and wrote down the same 3 labs i wrote the first time..knowing that ada kanousei (kemungkinan) bertindan lagi...

td masa kumpul tu kinda cuak la jugak...n then bila sensei happyo kekka terkejut..kenkyu hattori yg mula2 ramai gile mintak tu..tinggal empat or...yg ramai2 tu gi mintak lab lain...and soon...so last last my kenkyu tu tinggal 5 org cukup2...terus sensei suruh keluar gi jumpa lecturer masing2...Alhamdulillah...i got the lab i wanted....but sometimes..what might first appear great can make a u-turn and become ur worst nightmare...like what happened to me in Yuge and thesis theme at the time...well we'll just have to wait and see...won't we...

speaking of labs....masa shiraishi sensei jumpa kitorg td...dia bg la outline of what this year is gonna be like...he said it'll be extra hectic...sbb kena pindah dua kali...sbb dirg nak renovate bangunan...so starting tomorrow...activity mengemas bilik jikken...starting at 10...tp sempai(seniors-ada 2 org jek...M2 dua dua) kata...kalo buat kerja betul2 dtg lambat balik awal pun dia tak kata pape datte...so this year..sensei kata 2 bln sekkei pastu kakou n then terus nak buat jikken...

lepas tu he started withe the anzen dai ichi (safety first) talk...and he kinda scared me with teh cerita2 about has happened in the lab if you're not carefull... imagine jari tersepit dlm mesin yg dicipta to bear down tons of weight...or kanagata( die/ metal mould) blh terjatuh atas kaki seorg mamat tu...ohhh the horror..

sooooo out of sync....

i really don't like it when i'm not on top of things...
it sucks ...big time...

usually bila start a new schooling year nie...you know what you're supposed to do...pilih subjek..buat kenkoushindan (health check-up)....kira tan ii (credit hours) and so on...and you have a schedule to follow...

this year...well lets just say ..it's been hectic.. i came back to fukui quite late..so i don't know what's been going on...and then..tak sure pun dapat naik yonnen(final year) ke tak...and so on and so on...

time tidur pun tak betul...still holiday mode...meaning stay up all night and wake up...well lets just say i wake up late...and since i don't know the schedule ...tak tahu menahulah what i'm suppose to do on certain days...i find myself longing for the days when i know which class i'm supposed to go to...what assignments i should do...and where to find my teachers..oh did i tell you...they are renovating the bangunan kikai (mechanical) so my lecturers are scattered all over the campus..sampai nak cari my results pun susah...coz my lecturer misplaced the naik yonnen list..i had to search for another teacher to find out if i did get in..and what my num. in the whole department is...

well it's a good thing the teacher was in his kari (borrowed) office (since they r renovating)...and guess what ...good news...boleh dpt suisen(recommendation) if i choose to apply for masters...very good news indeed...

but then there's the kenkyu(research) thing....we have to pick our labs...yang tu pun ada jyouken(conditions) dia...the top students get to pick first...and yang lain kena jangken (rock-paper scissors) to pick the labs...

well...all in all next week baru confirm...i'm looking forword to settling down...and having a schedule...get back in my sync...you know

me NO well.....

excuse the bad english....
me no well...
me stomach no well....
couldnt't sleep all night coz of me stomach...
poor poor stomach.... poor poor me....
just wanna crawl back into me futon...and have me mommy take care of me...
booo hoooo hooo

Bills Bills Bills

ただいまもどりました　Home sweet home....haha...until u open your door and look at what's under your feet....bills bills and more bills...

plus...the mini rose plant i bought before going back has shriveled up and died....aye....

this is what happens when you leave home for too long...everything gets out of order...and it will take a few days and some 努力　on my part to get things running smoothly again...

till then...tak leh nak upload gambar....

my head's a mess right now....

so many things have happened in the last 28 days i had been back in Malaysia....my otak is tepu with all the emotions that ran through me during that time... i wanted to write then and share what i've gone through.....but then my otak tepu....so i'lll tell u sikit2 when i'm in a mood to write...

by the way..

today...my seniors at University of Fukui as well as seniors at Toyohashi University of Technology including my sayang, graduated...congratulations people....all the best kay...mata yoroshiku ne...

of new lives to come.....

i don't know what i'm feeling right now... blessed...sadness...proudness...kinchou...relieved...macam macam..

1 blessed because i'm alive, well, healthy, breathing, and i passed 2 out of 3 or my major papers already

2 sad because my seniors are leaving

3 proud of my juniors who are moving to new houses who will be starting a new chapter in their lives...the hitori gurashi chapter of their lives..

4 kinchou because then i'll be the eldest single girl

5 relief..because today after our makan makan at joyfull i suddenly felt the drive to strive again.. something i haven't felt in a while

6 scared of what lies ahead... i'm still not sure of what to do with my life

7 excited of what lies ahead ... all in all...i'm a box of emotions today...all wraped up... i'll miss you sempai s , it'll be quiet here next year without you

snowy saturday

Jan 24
spent the night at my senior's house yesterday..tak balik lepas usrah...groggy and sleepy cause we stayed up and borak yesterday....my head was cursing me and i was half cursing myself...u should have slept...macam mana nak focus...exam next thursday sayang oi....wake up and smell the coffee la...

anyway, people who know me will that I'm in my 本気モード because i've started cleaning...i have a habit of cleaning when i want to get down to business...

so
i cleaned the balcony, sweeped the floor
stowed away my fan (won't be needing it for the next few months)
washed the bathroom
refilled the rice bin (love the feeling of new rice)
washed the rags and bath curtain and kitchen mat..
i'm on a roll hhuh
NOT...fell asleep for 30 minutes...last night must be getting back at me

still need to simpan balik the books i took out to study last night...
iron and fold clothes..
and then i can get back to studying

you're on a roll babe...jom study everyone..exam exam

戦闘開始.....

to take tribo.. or not to take tribo.. that is the question

Written 10 days before my finals

another 10 days to exam week... went to fluid dynamics class this morning....had to drag myself out of my house/room. i dread going to this class...why cause i don't have to...but I do...it's a long story...

anyways, i actually found myself smilling on the way there today...all because i answered a particularly hard 加工解析 question before heading out...only to be greeted by a practically empty class...waited waited...and the lecturer never shows up.... while the class dwindles to a mere 10-15 people, my fellow Malaysians apear... and so....the conversation on exams start... we compare the exam schedules...number of papers...and who's got it tougher...

i brought up my problem to ask for their opinion.. why is it i hate coming to this class....because i was forced to...i enrolled for another class...one i have been attending without fail ...then this lecturer comes up and says i should drop the class and attend his , why he says...to better my understanding so that i can answer the questions that he gives us in another class (演習). me being strongheaded....didn't want to bend down...cause if i drop my tribo...i'll loose marks... i already enrolled...

but as the finals comes scarily closer...i decided to attend his class...and now i'm torn...should i or should i not take the tribo exam...should i go the extra mile... i asked mr.h...he said he agrees with teacher...'you should pay attention to the 必修's (the compulsory classes)' he said. on the other hand mr.u while holding the umbrella on the way back said that it would be a waste if i didn't, seeing that my marks will go down, and that heheard the exam was easy....but it's not...and that i'm sure of.

a part of me has already given up...saying i wouldn't do well, even if i took the exam...while the other, the one that's always pushing me to try my best, is creeping up with full force...cheering me on....

stilll no definite course of action

monday blues on tuesday...

Repost : Jan 13, 2009

it's tuesday...but it feels like a fr****ing monday....in the words of garfield....i hate mondays...okay i don't hate mondays...i'm just not very fond of the things mondays imply....getting up early in the morning after getting up late all weekend, the sleepy half awaken state your brain is in, the feeling that you didn't get enough rest and the reminders of all the things you should have finished up during the weekend that you haven't....and of course the daunting feeling that there will be another five days to go through before you get to next Saturday.....hahaha..

anyway...why does this tuesday feel like monday?...because semlm cuti kat nihon ni...cuti ape? Seijinnohi. Unfortunately, kat wikipedia ada version bahasa indonesia je....and my M is a bit besar...so bear with it ...to those yang tak faham bahasa ini kay... Hari Kedewasaan (成人の日, Seijin no hi?) adalah hari libur resmi di Jepang yang jatuh hari Senin minggu kedua di bulan Januari. Menurut undang-undang hari libur Jepang (Shukujitsu-hō), hari libur ini dimaksudkan untuk "merayakan generasi muda yang bisa hidup mandiri, dan menyadari telah menjadi dewasa." Upacara Seijin shiki diadakan pemerintah lokal di kota-kota dan desa-desa untuk meresmikan penduduk yang telah atau segera genap berusia 20 tahun, usia orang telah dianggap dewasa menurut hukum untuk boleh merokok, mengkonsumsi minuman beralkohol, dan mengikuti pemilihan umum.

All in all it's about celebrating the coming of age....

so anyway...since it has been snowing nonstop for three days...and since i haven't been out ....well let's just say getting to school was a work out...walking in snow is not as easy as you think...haha...that was ok...what's not ok is the fact that my snow shoes weren't working like they were suppose to....air masuk babe...damn cold snow water...in my shoes...arghhh...beli mahal2 ...what gives man...

so I had to indure that for the next four periods...masa nak smayang zohor bukak kasut tgk kaki dah biru...warghhh...never seen it like that before...the shoes are now drying in front of my trusty heater... mula2 ingt sempat kot kering b4 tomorrow...tp td tgk cam tak...so i asked for a favour from Mr.wb4...nice guy...and he obliged...so the 4 of us went....Mr.wb4, Mr.m, Ms.J and I...igt nak beli kasut je ...last2 beli beras, and socks skali...haha..special thanks to them...for venturing out with me on this cold night...especially Ms.J yang ada exam esok...

i'm suppose to be studying too...another 16 days to exams and 41 days to my sayang's return...speaking of sayang....hari ni dia tak genki...ngantuk kot...missing you lots mister... well...i was reading a friends blog just now and i realised...there are things we thought we'd only read in novels..well they can happen....to my friend...hope you hang in there... dreading tomorrow's shinro setsumeikai...haven't decided what to do with my life yet....

note to self....try to make tomorrow better than today

Of wars amongst people and with ourselves

Written 17 days before my finals...

Last Friday as usual, we had our weekly usrah ( a gathering where we muslims discuss our religion and what it pertains, gain knowledge from others, remind ourselves and so on). It is said that if we go without reflection, gainning knowledege or cleansing our minds for more than fourty days, a black spot is created in our heart.Allahualam.

Anyway, our usrah is only attended by the female malaysyian muslims in the area. It's small and homey, which suits me fine.You see, I'm not exactly pious. And having gone through some rough times about not being really pious, made me feel anxious about joining the usrah. I'm not good at reciting the Al-Quran, and this has bothered me since my earlier school days. For that matter, I really hope I will be able to teach my future children to embrace Al-Quran and be able to recite well, as well as understand it's meaning. For now that I am grown up, I sometimes feel regret, that I am 23 and still a long way away from being a good muslim. Saying that, after bearing my heart out about my problem to the girls, and being intimidated about most of them being great at reciting the Quran, after a few months I have finally become comfortable with what I am able to do. I don't have to be afraid of not being good at it anymore, cause I know now, it takes work to be good at something..and that's what I'm gonna have to do.

Back to the subject of wars, after Isya' prayers, and the recital of the Quran ( we recited Surah Al-Fath meaning The Victory) , went on to the subject of how to perform our prayers ( a reminder), and finally on to the war going on between Palestine and Israel. We talked about the history, why they are at war again and so on. We talked about what we could do. Of course the subject of boycotting came up. I never really boycotted anything, but after hearing that these companies contribute 10 to 15 million a day to Israel, I'm not so sure anymore. My senior said, when we die Allah will ask us, what have we done for our fellow muslims. I asked myself, what have I to answer.

Then comes the subject of warring with ourselves, there's always something we need to change in oursleves, and sometimes it's so hard to overcome you need to bring out the big guns and aim it ourselves. I have been warring with my big M (M besar = MALAS) a.k.a lazyness for the last 3 days.There are only 17 days left until the finals..and I am at level 0 for preparedness...how great is that, plus i have a test tomorrow and at the same time I am trying to cleanse my heart and soul. In short, i have a lot of things to accomplish, all at the same time. Battling my rindu for my sayang does not help. Miss him terribly. i decided to fast today, it being a Monday, I needed to ganti puasa anyway, and maybe it will help clear my mind as well... Yosh, 頑張るゼ.... all the best to myself and to those who have exams coming up....

reflection of my new year's post

written about a month ago...

it's not exactly new years eve...it's about seven days later. currently watching a movie starring cameron diaz called ' a life less ordinary' or something like that on cable tv. just arrived home from a week of preparing for my sayang's departure to Canada...too tired to cook anything..so I'm in front of my noDell( nickname for my laptop) and I decided to start a blog.. my sayang left for Canada about two hours ago...and waiting the 11 hours it takes for him to get there from Japan is excrutiating. I hate having to wait for the news and praying is all I can do for now.'Please arrive safely' that's all i'm thinking in my head at the moment.

back to the subject of new years... it's the seventh of january...and in japan it's called Jinjitsu (人日, jinjitsu), literally "Human Day".One of the five seasonal festivals (五節句, gosekku). Also known as Nanakusa no sekku (七草の節句, nanakusa no sekku), "the feast of seven herbs", from the custom of eating seven-herb kayu (七草粥, nanakusa-gayu) to ensure good health for the coming year. The nanakusa are seven edible wild herbs of spring. Traditionally, they are : Water dropwort (seri, Oenanthe javanica) Shepherd's purse (nazuna) Cudweed (gogyō, Gnaphalium affine) Chickweed (hakobera, Stellaria media) Nipplewort (hotokenoza, Lapsana apogonoides) Turnip (suzuna) Daikon (suzushiro) There is considerable variation in the precise ingredients, with common local herbs often being substituted. On the morning of January 7, or the night before, people place the nanakusa, rice scoop, and/or wooden pestle on the cutting board and, facing the good-luck direction, chant "Before the birds of the continent (China) fly to Japan, let's get nanakusa" while cutting the herbs into pieces. This chant varies as well. The seventh of the first month has been an important Japanese festival since ancient times. The custom of eating nanakusa-gayu on this day, to bring longevity and health, developed in Japan from a similar ancient Chinese custom, intended to ward off evil. Since there is little green at that time of the year, the young green herbs bring color to the table and eating them suits the spirit of the New Year. The spring-time nanakusa are mirrored by the "seven flowers of autumn", which are bush clover (hagi), miscanthus (obana, Miscanthus sinensis), kudzu, large pink (nadeshiko, Dianthus superbus), yellow flowered valerian (ominaeshi, Patrinia scabiosaefolia), boneset (fujibakama, Eupatorium fortunei), and Chinese bellflower (kikyō). These seven autumn flowers provide visual enjoyment. Their simplicity was very much admired: they are small and dainty yet beautifully colored. They are named as typical autumn flowers in a verse from the Man'yōshū anthology.

now back to life... winter break ends tonight and tomorrow classes start again...and i have the dreaded 熱流体力学演習. a class involving exercises regarding thermodynamics and fluid dynamics. i dread this class ...it being a compulsary class and relying only on the exrecises for grading makes life a little scary...coz if i fail this i won't get into final year. and that won't be good..coz i might not get my scholarship for next year if i have to repeat 3rd year...arghhh...the agony..of the uncertainity i guess that's about it for now.... another person's life story...another person's words to be read

reflecting back on my words... i'm grateful my sayang has arrived and is well in Canada.. currently awaiting his return to Japan in about another 8 days.. it has been a long month for both of us.. each dealing with our own mountains to climb and rivers to cross.. life is colourful is it not..

re-reading has me thinking of how wraped my head was around that class and that teacher.. and now that it is over... well let's just say that the words above was what was going through my head at the time.. and now... it's just in the past..

a third start ... a new beginning

this is my third blog...I've moved blogs about three times ... don't really have a reason for it but hey... it's free...so what the heck..

new ideas come with new surroundings... new interractions... thus the new blog

i once thought of a blog as a diary that isn't private... nowadays i'm not so sure anymore.. you share your daily ups and downs to something more then just pieces of paper bound together... you share it with whomever wishes to stop by your little corner in the web and take time to read your thoughts.. your aspirations..

words to be re-read, thoughts to be reflected on, choices to re-evaluated, emotions to be rekindled...